Saturday, September 23, 2006

L'Shana Tova

I'm spending Rosh Hashanah alone this year, for the first time in quite a while, while others celebrate with their "families." I suppose I'm not Jewish enough for some people, and not Christian enough for others. A lonely place, indeed. I feel like a hyphen, a very long and sharply pronounced hyphen.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Is that really the whole story? Sounds too simple; sounds as if some "context" is missing. Why did you place quotations around "families"? What are you trying to say about the "people" who you claim have abandoned you? Special pleading is inappropriate on Rosh Hashana. Given the nature and intent of this holiday, which is one of true reflection, contemplation, transformation, repentence, and renewal, perhaps the better post might have been to examine how you found yourself in this position this year, and what you can do, should so, must do, to ensure that you never find yourself feeling this way next year, or any other year thereafter. Just a "friendly" comment from an anonymous reader.

Anonymous said...

Very interesting post. Are you saying that there are Christians who you are interested in being with--romantically, spiritually, emotionally, physically, intellectually--on this holiday, and on all other holidays, who are rejecting you because you regard yourself as a hyphenated Jew?

Bill Cooper said...

I don't know your reasons, but I find it difficult spending what should be for me religous holidays (Easter Christmas), with my relatives who are still actively religous. I can no longer share belief with them, but when I am with non religous people I find their lack of knowledge and understanding of the sources of the holiday disturbing. Its hard.

Monica said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Monica said...

I'm with you, bill cooper, and thanks for stopping by. It's really about a sense of not quite belonging in either world, or in one particular belief system.

Monica said...

"anonymous," friendly indeed -- it looks as though you may have misread my post. I never referred to myself as a "hyphenated Jew." I'm actually not quite sure what that would mean, what kind of nuances that would signal. I referred to myself, in a moment of cultural and theological reflection, as a hyphen -- somebody who is in between worlds, religions, or cultures, or all of the above. It's not really a new idea.

But in terms of context, I suppose you would need to know that this is the first year since I've been at graduate school in the Midwest (studying Jewish literature and philosophy) that I have not been invited to any local gatherings in honor of the holidays. My point is that perhaps I am not "Jewish enough" -- to have been included in any "family" gatherings here in my community. The problem, however, is that despite my Christian background, I am perhaps not Christian enough for some of my family members back home. It's simply a strange, and often unstable, place to inhabit, and that was my point.

Further, I did not claim that anyone "abandoned" me. I'm not quite sure what you're doing here, other than misreading my post entirely. Nor did I claim to be "rejected" by any Christians. Finally, though I don't know that this would be the appropriate venue to discuss my romantic inclinations, physical or otherwise, my boyfriend, living in New York, is Jewish, and your question about whether I am interested in spending this holiday with a Christian who is rejecting me seems a bit silly, since, last time I checked, Christians don't celebrate Jewish Holidays.

Anonymous said...

Monica, you were invited to DC with me? Or Los Angeles with me? I made you soup. Can I send?

Monica said...

Yes! Yes! Send me soup! Wish I could have been there with you!